Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Eye on the prize.

It's hard for me to keep my eye on the prize. Which the "prize" for me at this point is paying off our debt so that I can be a SAHM with Aden and hopefully to a new baby in at least two years. Two years seems like a long way away but in reality it's nothing. Really, I was looking at some old videos of mine on YouTube when I first got Shasta and it's been FOUR YEARS since I got her. It doesn't even seem real. I feel like I did not reach my goal I had intended on when I purchased Shasta (my barrel racing horse) at all. This makes me sick. Just sick. But things change and sometimes new goals replace old ones. The truth of the matter is no matter how much I love being around and riding horses; I know my time with my family at this stage is irreplaceable.

This is why I’m so determined to keep on track with our current “plan”. I'm trying to stay positive. Every day working and being away from Aden when I want to be a home putting all my effort into him, it's hard. I love my family so deeply and want what's best for us all.

AND, I need to lose this baby weight. 20 lbs and they're not budging. I need to get an obtainable goal and stick with it. I think the main problem here is that there are just not enough hours in the day to complete my never ending task that I know I need to do. I've decided to "commit" to working out on my lunch break. I love food too much to "starve" the baby weight off which means the only other way is to burn it off!

Side note:

I intended this blog to be a place where everyone could go on updates on Aden. While it's done just that, it's also a place where I can go and just write out what's going on in my head. Cheap therapy is what Stephanie called it! And that it is. Anyway, I'm rambling sorry. I just wanted to thank all of my dear friends and family that read it and comment on my blog. Y'all have no idea how much that means to me. Thank you!

Aden has such the little personality. My mini - me for sure. Remember when he was crawling / climbing on the dishwasher.

Like this.

Well he has "upgraded" to this:

The months of summer are flying by.


Megan Brown said...

Good for you!!!! Stickin to the plan and keeping the prize in mind! Some people only work out like three times a week and notice huge differences so good luck and I'm sure you'll feel better once you start workin out! Even though it depressed me because I'm the type that likes to see instant results.. lol.. and instant results in weight loss NEVER HAPPEN. And on days you don't get to go out for your lunch, what about walking with Aden in the evenings too? That'd be nice for James too! Keith and I love taking walks. :-)

Brynn said...

Yes, I would LOVE to do that and will as soon as it cools down! It's still like 95 degrees at 9 pm here.